More than ever I am learning that I am a total and complete freak.
Of course I've known this for some time but it wasn't until recently that I realized what level of weird I've become. I was hanging with a guy that I just recently met, we were driving home and I looked at him, then at the road, then at him, then I just exploded on him a full on profile of himself I'd put together from observing him and his life, from his tattoos to his smoking habits.
Of course I've known this for some time but it wasn't until recently that I realized what level of weird I've become. I was hanging with a guy that I just recently met, we were driving home and I looked at him, then at the road, then at him, then I just exploded on him a full on profile of himself I'd put together from observing him and his life, from his tattoos to his smoking habits.
It's one thing to notice things, and a whole different thing to actually say them out loud.
I've never done that before. Just laid it all out there. That's not normal. And it put me in a very vulnerable position because even though it was his life story strung out in the air, it was my heart that opened up to read it. I realized in that moment that observation reveals as much about the observer as the observed. His response kind of sent me reeling. He was actually impressed rather than freaked out. He thought it was quote, "awesome". I sat in this guy's car and basically told him "I've known you for a week but I know what your life has looked like for the past 10 years." And all he said was "that's pretty cool that you picked up on all that stuff."
I felt like Sherlock Holmes when John simply says "That was amazing". Sherlock is right when he said "That's not what people normally say". Not many people like knowing they can be read like the cover of a book, even fewer people enjoying hearing what they're "book cover" has to say about them. Most people say something like "that was weird" or look at me like they're taking notes for a restraining order.
I've never not been thought of as a freak. In my head, I loved him as a dear friend from that moment on simply because he found me to be interesting rather than overwhelming. My best friends accept that I'm a freak and find my oddities confusing if not entertaining. But they still see them as odd. To him though...I wasn't. There's a safety in that which I have nowhere else in this world.
"Sherlock Holmes: When I met you for the first time yesterday, I said "Afghanistan or Iraq?" You looked surprised.
Dr John Watson: Yes. How did you know?
Sherlock Holmes: I didn't know, I saw. ..."
